Saturday, September 13, 2014

Mitt Romney Boldly Admits: "I Would Have Done A Better Job Than Obama"

Well there it is.

The truth laid bare in front of us as plain as day.

All it took was a man of infallible judgement, 20/20 hindsight vision and an incredible lack of class and character to point out the truth.

That man is Mitt... Mitt Romney.

The former Republican presidential candidate has emphatically stated the undeniable and inescapable truth that in his mind there is no question that he would have been more a more effective President than the White House's present occupant Barack Obama.

Citing continuing high U.S. unemployment and growing troubles abroad he feels that the poor saps who voted for Obama might now be experiencing some buyer's remorse.

After all there is no disputing Mitt's claim of imaginary Presidential supremacy. Just look at how all of his purposed economic and foreign policies differ from those President Obama has implemented. Hey, there's... Ummmm... And there's the one about.... Ahhh.... don't forget how he said the thing.... Oh, never mind. Mitt knows his statement is true because he feels it in his gut and that should be good enough for all of us.

What I am sure you all will agree is the truly upsetting news here is that Mitt claims he has no plans to run again telling Fox News...

"My time has come and gone (sniff)... I'm not running and not planning on running,"

Romney also told the nice people over at Fox that he doesn't want to dwell on the past, all the while claiming is the same breath that mistakes were made in his campaign and that the Obama campaign did a good job on picking up on them #imtotallyoverit.

Let me take this moment on behalf of all humanity to say... Thanks Obama!

For now we only have our imaginations to guide us when we try to imagine the trouble free, fully employed, peaceful, utopian world Mr. Willard Mitt Romney could have given us if you hadn't messed everything up by making him lose.

Disclaimer: This utopian society does not apply to the 47% Mitt doesn't care about.

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