Saturday, March 30, 2013

Jim Carrey's "Cold Dead Hand"

OK, Let's start with this. Last week comedian Jim Carrey made a scathing satirical video named "Cold Dead Hand" as his response to the killing of 20 innocent 5 and 6 year old children in the Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting. In response to Carrey's video the NRA, Fox News and all gun nuts around America have shit their collective pants. The pant shitting was due to the fact that 1) the video garnered 1.8 million views in it's first 3 days and 2) it was deadly accurate in it's lambasting of gun owners and their gun culture.

Let's have a look at the video causing all the fuss…
Click the image to play the video
 In my opinion the song is brilliant, the premise is hilarious and the message is deadly accurate. The spoofing of the TV show "Hee Haw" and actor Charlton Heston is inspired. "Hee Haw" was middle America's dumbed down answer to the much hipper "Laugh In" making the show a parody from the get go. Charlton Heston, while in his heyday was a figure that commanded respect, later on in his life became a caricature of that figure for becoming a tool of the NRA. Heston was also ridiculed for his jingoistic and imbecilic catchphrase "I'll give you my gun when you pry (or take) it from my cold, dead hands". Heston is as legitimate a target to lampoon as any dearly departed liberal icon we could dig up.

In the opinion of the NRA, Fox News and gun nuts this is the most heinous video to ever make it's way to the internet. Instead of embracing the satirical brilliance of the clip they seem to take everything in it literally. They especially hate the tiny penis reference in the song. I wonder why? They also hate the fact that Carry uses Republican icon Charlton Heston as a vehicle to carry out his anti gun message.

Some of the most vicious attacks have emanated from an unknown Fox News pundit named Greg Gutfeld. Gutfeld is one of the five hosts on the cleverly named show "The Five" and used his time on the show attacking and insulting Carrey. Here are some of the nasty, infantile insults Gutfeld hurled at Carrey: "He is probably the most pathetic tool on the face of the earth and I hope his career is dead and I hope he ends up sleeping in a car. [...] This video made me want to go out and buy a gun. He thinks this is biting satire going after rural America and a dead man... He's a dirty, stinking coward... He's such a pathetic, sad, little freak. He's a gibbering mess. He's a modern bigot." Sounds like someone's off their meds.

The over the top hyperbolic attack is an obvious and pathetic ploy to get Jim Carrey to attack Gutfeld thus bringing attention to himself and his show. Talk about punching down... Way down.

Carry has instead responded to the attacks on Twitter saying: "I'd like to respond to all the conservative bundits out there personally but I'm far too busy NOT stumping for the gun companies,". He also tweeted that the success of "Cold Dead Hand" was "forcing intolerent goons everywhere to show their hideous face."

Carrey's also issued a full statement blasting Fox News:
Since I released my "Cold Dead Hand" video on Funny or Die this week, I have watched Fux News rant, rave, bare its fangs and viciously slander me because of my stand against large magazines and assault rifles. I would take them to task legally if I felt they were worth my time or that anyone with a brain in their head could actually fall for such irresponsible buffoonery. That would gain them far too much attention which is all they really care about.
I'll just say this: in my opinion Fux News is a last resort for kinda-sorta-almost-journalists whose options have been severely limited by their extreme and intolerant views; a media colostomy bag that has begun to burst at the seams and should be emptied before it becomes a public health issue.

I sincerely believe that in time, good people will lose patience with the petty and poisonous behavior of these bullies and Fux News will be remembered as nothing more than a giant culture fart that no amount of Garlique could cure.


I wish them all the luck that accompanies such malevolence.
Thank you Jim Carrey for your "Cold Dead Hand"!
This one is for you Fox News!

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